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A Fish Called David BlaineFriday, Apr. 14, 2006 12:52 AMFrom the What Were You Thinking Department comes the travails of Jeremiah Ransom, a student at the University of Georgia. Ransom ran afoul of agents from the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms, who were on campus for a community training project. They detained Ransom because he was running around campus dressed like a ninja. Apparently, there was a 'pirate vs. ninja' event on campus, but Ransom was enough of a twit that he left the event with his face still wrapped in red bandannas. (Now, we all know real ninjas dress in black, but for the purposes of the gathering, black sweat pants, an athletic t-shirt, and red bandannas were acceptable.) Ransom says he was jogging; agents describe him as acting in a suspicious manner, peeping around the corner before breaking into a run. It's a good thing no one got arrested for imitating Jack Sparrow. David Blaine thinks he's a fish. This time, the magician will be living underwater for a full week in a 'human aquarium' in front of New York's Lincoln Center. The crowning achievement will be Blaine's holding his breath underwater for more than the existing record of 8 minutes and 58 seconds. ABC thinks you'll be so fascinated that you'll stick around for two hours. Blaine's first special, entitled Street Magic, featured him levitating - though the illusion was never shown, only montages of people going, "Oh, my God!" Then he embarked on a world tour, doing things like terrifying natives by removing and restoring the head from a live chicken. Of late, however, Blaine's illusions have been of the Harry Houdini on mescaline variety. Blaine has been frozen alive, balanced on a platform for 35 hours, and fasting for 44 days. No escapes. No disappearances. No pulling rabbits out of hats. Maybe Peter Jackson can use him in a remake of The Incredible Mr. Limpet.
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