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Waiting For The Democrats

Thursday, Mar. 30, 2006 1:02 AM

I have one comment about the Democrats' just-unveiled national security platform.

What the hell took you so long?

The platform is supposedly designed to neutralize the advantage Republicans have held on national security and terrorism issues, one of the critical factors in the 2002 midterm elections and in Bush's victory over Sen. John Kerry in 2004.

The Democrats had to wait until Republicans dropped the ball? Nobody came to the game with a plan to win?

Oh, that's right, we had Terry McAuliffe, the genius who once predicted that Democrats would, '... beat Bush in a cakewalk,' come 2004, leading the way. And then we picked Howard "Spam King" Dean, who can't muster the spinal fortitude to support Sen. Russ Feingold's motion to censure President Bush OR denounce it, but has the stones to hit me up for contributions.

Hint: it doesn't matter how incompetent President Bush may be if y'all can't present yourselves as being more competent. And, with disgusting regularity, the Democrats have thundered out of the gate, then wandered off in a daze like they've forgotten which way the end zone is.

Speaking of cluelessness, today's No-Prize goes to President Bush for his profound advice to Iraqi leaders.

"It's about time you get a unity government going. In other words, Americans understand newcomers to the political arena, but pretty soon it's time to shut her down and get governing."

Although we had Articles of Confederation within a year of the signing of the Declaration of Independence, it wasn't until ten years later - 1787 - that the full Constitution of the United States was ratified. And the entire War of Independence could be dated from the issuance of the Stamp Act in 1765.

Maybe you should ask Lynne Cheney for an advance copy of her book on American History.

And then stop insulting the Iraqis. It's not like you've lived up to your billing as a consensus-builder.

Oh, regarding that War on Christians and Navy Chaplain James Klingenschmitt?

It appears that more than 70 percent of his fellow chaplains throughout the United States military, including other evangelical Christians, feels a presidential order guaranteeing the right of chaplains to pray in the name of Jesus is unnecessary.

Because no one has told Christians they can't use Jesus' name at all.

An order by the Secretary of the Navy from February of this year distinguishes between prayers given at divine worship services and those delivered at functions where people of many faiths are encouraged or required to attend.

Seems simple enough. Still, a spokesman for a second group that claims to speak for roughly 800 evangelical Christian chaplains maintains that chaplains have been disciplined for praying in Jesus' name, and that they have documentation of same.

Frankly, if I were of a faith other than Christianity, I would want services specific to my faith to be conducted in an appropriate manner, not with some forced cross-pollination by an evangelical Christian chaplain with a persecution complex.

Or, to be even more blunt, y'all can shout "Praise Jesus!" in the middle of my divine observances if I can shout, "Allahu Akbar!" or, "Praise Odin!" in the middle of yours.

It's time to stow this anti-Christian nonsense and recognize that we live on a planet with diverse cultures and faiths, and that's not going to change. (Unless you subscribe to the Coulter Doctrine of killing off foreign leaders and converting the population to Christianity.)

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