The Ministry of Shadows

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I Done Told You Once ...

Wednesday, Apr. 16, 2008 3:46 AM


To William Jefferson Clinton: Perhaps I'm not being clear enough. You were a decent enough president, Bill, but you decided that your office included certain privleges. For that, you were impeached - rightfully, if not at the best of times or for the purest of motives - and you lost any trust I might have held.

But you somehow seem to think America still worships at the Temple of Clintonia, because the past eight years of Bush-o-Rama have been nothing but a disaster.

Yet, over the past few weeks, you've told us that the Amazing Hillary really did face considerable risks in Bosnia (do you always send your wife and teenage daughter into a combat zone?). You've told us to 'chill out' and that, essentially, younger people don't know shit, while older people are gravitating towards Hillary because they recognize the cachet of wisdom.

More like the cachet of bullshit. I'm inherently suspicious of people who establish their credentials by praising mine, or 'you're smart, therefore I'm a good choice.' (I pointed out another entry in this category yesterday - the 'many of you, like myself' routine, first telling the audience what they think and then asserting that the Amazing Hillary agrees with them.)


The McCain Campaign explains that Recipegate - the posting and attribution of Food Network recipes as 'McCain Family Recipes' shared by Cindy McCain - was the work of an unpaid intern.

Really? You let an unpaid intern directly add content to the website for a national campaign? Without supervision? Beyond that, if the intern was told to add 'Cindy's recipes,' either Mrs. McCain was unable to do so, or refused to talk to a mere intern.


From the Your G-String May Be Too Tight Department comes singer Charlie Daniels' concerns about the popular game Guitar Hero III.

The latest release in the popular series chronicles the adventures of a rock band from their humble beginnings in a garage to superstardom ... and a showdown with their agent, Lou, who turns out to be Satan. To be fair, the devil offers you one last chance - beat him in a head-to-head guitar battle, with the song being Daniels' The Devil Went Down to Georgia.

Daniels' concern is not just that the country's youth is being exposed to unhealthy ideas, but that 'very often, the Devil wins.' Daniels also complains that the game's creators did not consult him before using the song, but admits that he lost the rights as part of a settlement with a former partner.

Having played Guitar Hero III (on Easy, I'm a wimp), the battle with the devil is not as challenging as previous in-game duels with Tom Morello (Rage Against The Machine) and Slash (Guns N' Roses). And at no point did I feel that my soul was in jeopardy, because I tend to empathize with the hero of the song, and not the nemesis.



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